Saturday, August 01, 2009


I know I have written about marriage before, but I feel there are more things to say.

Adam and Eve were married in the garden of Eden. They were not yet subject to death and therefore their marriage was intended to last for forever.

Our marriages are also supposed to last forever.

In The Family: A Proclamation to the World the First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints state:

"The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity."

As morals in our society crumble, as more people accept secular teachings as their 'gospel' and way of life, the Lord declares through His Church leaders that marriage and family as essential to His eternal plan! I believe that statement.

Mike and I have been married as of Aug 11 th for 30 years. People sometimes gasp when I tell them that. They tell me how lucky we are. Luck has nothing to do with it. We work hard at our marriage to keep it alive and important. It has never been luck, and it has never been easy. We have had many trials, many slams against us to succeed, but instead of turning off each other, or pulling away, we pull closer together and try to work together to make things work.

We are not of the same faith.
We come from pretty different backgrounds.
We have different hobbies, but enough in common to keep us happy
We have never had enough money to live high on the hog; and still rarely even go out to eat. Our dates are watching Star Trek next Generation on DVD's I get from the library.
We feel blessed when there is enough money to pay the bills each month.
We have 5 children, 1 still at home, and I was able until recently, able to stay home to care for them - unusual these days.
We both work, and work hard!

We still love each other, and mean the world to each other. Also unusual, but great!

Do I just want to run away with Mike and go to Hawaii or someplace--have a 2nd honeymoon... YES!! Every single day. We are committed to each other and to those vows we took so long ago, to love and cherish one another, in good times and bad, for better and for worse... we actually MEANT that when we said 'I do'.

Take time for each other.
Wives, do things for your husbands... make him feel loved. Make his favorite dinner. Do the little things... iron his hankies if he likes them that way, put little love notes in his lunch, hug him and tell him of your love for him. Be faithful in your thoughts, and words, and deeds.
Husbands, cherish your wives as Christ cherished the Church. Open doors for her. Help her with the housecleaning without being asked. Hug her. Tell her how much you love her. Be there for her. Be faithful to your wife in every action and thought. Treat her as a Princess.
Both- Work hard and be self reliant. Earn the things you own. Stay out of debt.

As I look back on these past 30 years, I am so grateful for the life Mike and I share; that we trust each other, and go out of our way to show that we care. It isn't easy, but our marriage is good because we don't look outside of the marriage for fulfillment of any kind. That's important.

May your love grow every day as you work to ensure that happens, and may the Lord watch over you and yours.

HUG THE ONES YOU LOVE! and pray for them every day.

and don't forget the HATS!


Lulu said...

wow, what a lovely post dear Bev..
you two are very lucky to have found each other..
have a great sunday..

HilsGal said...

That was a wonderful post Bev. This is exactly how we looked at our marriage. Don't ask what you can get out of it, put 100% of yourself into it and you will get back many fold.

Debbie said...

Hi Bev, what a wonderful and inspirational post! Thank you so much. I see my husband doing all of those things for me but I've been lacking with him recently. Allowing lifes hardships and sorrows to guide me. Thank you for your words - I know my husband will thank you too.

God Bless,

Rose said...

Happy Anniversary and thank you for sharing!

Monson Family II said...

Dear Bev- You're humanitarian efforts have really inspired me. I have contacted a local hospital and will be starting to make much needed bereavement sets right outside of new york city. I do have a few questions. Would you be able to email me? My email is and I wanted to know if it was important to prewash the fabric used for the bereavement sets in the no color/no scent laundry detergent- like you do for newborns?

Katie Monson

bevq said...

I will email you too Katie in case you don't see this, but I wanted to post it for others to see too-- great question.

As always, it's best to ask your local hospital where you are taking things what they prefer.

My thoughts are these... if you are a smoker. have pets, use perfumes, I always recommend prewashing. For the adults there who come in contact with your handmade items. I have asked UMC where I donate, and they don't mind either way, so that's just me.